Belonging

I’ve always had difficulties fitting in. I grew up in a house full of 20-year-old college students (and my parents) and always felt sort of out of place with kids my age. All through elementary school and junior high I felt like people didn’t like me or accept me, so I avoided them, and became seriously antisocial. I had some friends at my church, but in the fifth grade we changed churches, and it took me a good four or five years to establish friendships there.

For a while in eighth and ninth grade I had some friends, but near the middle of ninth grade that feeling of being out of place crept up on me again. It got to the point where I decided to change schools (or rather, quit going to school- that’s when I decided to be fully homeschooled). I was kind of at an all time low, self-esteem-wise.  Continue reading

Amidst the Mayhem

June is production month. I’m talking about theatre, of course. June is when I drive an hour to the theatre every single day to either have a rehearsal, work the other cast’s rehearsal, have a show, or work a show. Every single day. Except Sundays. It’s kind of insane; fortunately I’m already out of school or else I might drop dead.

Unfortunately, I got a really terrible cold several days ago. First I got a fever (while I was working backstage) and while I suspected it, I didn’t know for sure until I got home. I then broke the fever in ten minutes by trying to sleep under like five blankets. The next day I felt fine, but the day after that I completely lost my voice. I couldn’t say a word. I communicated through sign language and in one specific case, lip reading (there’s an incredibly talented lip reader on my set crew). The day after that the rest of the cold hit me, and it was pretty horrible. And amidst all this I was still going to all my rehearsals.  Continue reading